Photo: FBI

A White Man Wore Blackface to Rob a Bank

If you’re one of the many white people who think that dressing up in blackface is a good idea, you’re an asshole. If you’re a white person who wears blackface to rob a bank, you’re an even bigger asshole. So by that definition, 40-year-old Jarred Schmittle, who was just arrested for robbing a Wells Fargo bank in California this summer while wearing blackface, is an asshole.

The robbery occurred in August, when Jarred allegedly painted his face black, put on beanie and waltzed his white ass into the Wells Fargo financial institution located on the 11000 block of De Palma Road in Corona, California. When he handed the bank teller a note demanding cash, he also allegedly told her that he was armed. Given what little we know about Jarred, it’s doubtful that he actually had a gun.

The teller triggered a silent alarm and Jarred, not wanting to stick around and wait for the cash, ran off empty-handed. Now he’s sitting in jail facing bank robbery charges.

Clearly this was a case of an idiot a white man who thought that by painting his face black, police nor bank employees would’ve noticed that he was actually white and would have instead sent law enforcement on a wild goose chase looking for a random black man. Thankfully, his disgusting disguise didn’t fool anyone. Police said at the time of the robbery that the suspect was someone “with obvious dark make-up to disguise his appearance,” which is an understatement to say the least. And after months of police attempting to identify the would-be robber, a tip led to his downfall.

It’s a pretty remarkable feat to manage to be racist while also committing a bank robbery, but somehow this guy Jarred managed to do both. To sum up Jarred’s actions briefly: He dressed in blackface, unsuccessfully robbed a bank, and is now in jail.

Jared, you suck.

We’ve already reminded folks to not be racist assholes while dressing up for Halloween, but here’s another PSA from your friends at MASS APPEAL: Don’t be a racist asshole while robbing a bank.

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