Sochi Fashion Games
"May the odds be ever in your favor."
If you’ve been following the lead up to the Olympics in Sochi at all, you’ve probably heard that the whole thing has been what some might call a clusterfuck of chaos. Between Russia’s #nohomo stance to their sus garbage men to the surveillance cameras in the showers, we almost wonder why they haven’t pulled the plug on the whole thing already.
The conspiracy theorist in me wonders if perhaps Vladimir Putin is harbering President Snow tendencies and plans to unravel his own rendition of “The Hunger Games” in the coming weeks. Certainly this chick looks more fit for The Capitol than the trash strewn streets of Sochi.
Speaking of suspect fashion, I should probably point my barrel of insults a little closer to home. While Ralph Lauren killed it on the patriotism, the “village apparel” as it is so aptly named would look more at home on crazy Aunt Margaret’s holiday card than ice shredding athletes. That shit looks itchy as hell and if the heating facilities in Sochi are anything like the Internet and plumbing, the participants will probably be wearing their clothes to bed – half slept itchy athletes don’t make for champions Ralph. But maybe that’s just me?
I chopped it up with Polo aficionado Thirstin Howl the III to get his take on the shady sartorialism. “I think it’s beautiful,” the rapper said. “Some people don’t know how to put it together but I could definitely make a killer outfit. It wouldn’t be something I’d wear everyday but for an occasion.” With a clothing collection to rival Ralph himself, I should probably heed the advice of the polo pundit and up my fashion anti. But with the women’s sweater going for $395 and the men’s jacket a staggering $795 maybe this style is better left for the WASPs in Aspen. Besides, as Howl points out, “It looks comfortable, almost like pajamas.” Let’s just hope the patchwork stitching can hold its own when the games get real.
But I digress. Good luck Team U.S.A. May The Odds be Ever in Your Favor.