Nathan Pyle, an NYC transplant via Ohio (five years strong) and artist, recently released a book illustrating the etiquette that New Yorkers should possess when out and about, along with some sound advice on staying sane amongst the public.
I enjoy the practicality and words of (hilarious) wisdom he drops via these illustrations, but most importantly: when tempers flare high in the streets of NYC, this book could save you from getting your ass whooped, aka catching the fade. Pyle should have named his illustrative masterpiece, “NYC’s Basic Tips and Etiquette to Not Getting Beat-The-Fuck-Up.” Below are my top three ways to avoid catching the fade in New York City.
1. If you have some smelly-ass, caramelized onion-esque-ass cuisine tucked away in a plastic bag, keep it that way. No one wants to watch you unleash the dragon (aka your funky Spicy Pad Thai).
2. Everyone hates waiting in lines, so why make it more difficult for others by not forming a straight line? Most of these scenarios (see: the DMV) always end in a shouting match or altercation. In other words, this is a sure-fire way to get slapped.
3. How much of a rush are you in that you can’t let a person exit out of a parking space, or allow them to fully exit from public transportation? I never saw the value in rushing to get past someone on a bus or train, only to end up barely getting a seat next to an elderly woman who cannot control her flatulence. C’mon man.
Go cop that book and save yourself from an ass-whooping, or two.