Kids are getting chased by cops—and they’re crashing cars—because they allegedly stole potato chips, and Mitt Romney is saying stupid shit about black unemployment. In June, while the overall unemployment rate remained stuck at 8.2 percent, the unemployment rate for African-Americans actually went up, from 13.6 percent to 14.4 percent. America has moved on to the new slaves—the Latino Americans—and we’re putting them to work.
“Slavery” ended in 1865, but when you watch television shows wherein people can stop the repossession of their cars if they can get some pretty easy trivia questions right (#Repo Games), you realize that most Americans—even the white ones—are slaves. I’m talking about economic slavery, not the actual and literal bondage that millions of people endure every day (they say there are more slaves in the world than ever before). I’m talking about that green slavery. Not weed-green. Money green. And I’m talking about Mitt and Obama.
In America, slaves weren’t allowed to be educated. But slaves didn’t have car notes and they didn’t have to deal with the possibility of foreclosure (then again, slaves didn’t get them 40 acres and a mule either). Slavery is still here and that debt on your ass is making you work like a slave and you are broke and broken and cops are chasing you for fried and dried potatoes in a bag. I got emotional when the white lady said that she was the only person in her household working, that she had to
support a bunch of kids, her man and her uncle. She got the stupid trivia questions
right and the host had the tow truck lower her car to the ground. Her whole family
cheered. They blurred out the uncle’s face either because he didn’t want to sign the
release or because he was too ugly.
People are hurting in America.
And the big news is that Frank Ocean is gay—maybe that’s why he’s selling so many records right now. “Oh, Frank Ocean is gay. I wonder what a gay record sounds like. Let me go buy that gay record. I’m about that gay record.” Frank Ocean isn’t a statistic, though: he’s a black man with a J-O-B. No romance without finance: Frank is a catch, fellas.
People are saying that Mitt and Obama might end up in a dead-ass tie. I think America is hungry and desperate and sometimes lazy but mostly a land of freed slaves working for masters who are greedy, masters who wanna fuck and fuck you as much as possible—because the view from atop the mountain is more breathtaking than the view from atop a project roof.
Obama might have been working in the Big House if he was living in South Carolina, circa 1863. Because he’s bi-racial. Today, Obama is my president and he lives in the White House and I think that is amazing, America. But he’s got some amazing dilemmas ahead of him and behind him—dilemmas that are itching to catch up to him and tackle him. Mitt: I don’t know you but you don’t know me and you certainly don’t know blacks and I’m sure you dig your life just fine. If you were to become president, you’d have to deal with black people. Is that something you’re really