Lie to me and tell me you don’t like Entenmann’s donuts. I am standing here at a crossroads in my life. Do I give up on my beloved baked goods? Or do I rally everyone I know to support my one true love? Link arms and plant our feet firmly in the name of coffee crumb. Sure, there’s a lot of places to get fresh donuts now. But what about when you can’t run to that donut shop because you just want to rest on your couch? First New York took away my Krispy Kremes and left me with only ONE miniature stand in Penn Station, and now they are cutting back on my Entenmann’s? This is nothing but fucked. Tears are raining onto see-through cake boxes everywhere.
Entenmann’s Bakery announced Mar. 27 that it will shut down its 53-year-old Bay Shore plant in Long Island. Not only does this leave 178 of its 265 on-site workers out of a job, but it leaves the rest of the world and 9 million New Yorkers in despair. How are you supposed to curl up on a the couch with a joint and watch “Workaholics” without Entenmann’s?! How are you supposed to go on a road trip with your friends without Entenmann’s?! I don’t know the answers to these questions. But I do know that the glazed donut holes filled a void in my heart that no man could ever replace. How am I, and us as a community, supposed to move on? Anyway, to get back to the details, the company has been owned by Bimbo Bakeries USA, a division of the Mexican Group Bimbo. Why can’t these bimbo’s just keep making donuts? Well, an executive made an announcement that the company’s Bay Shore facility, “Cannot operate efficiently on a cost competitive basis with the other bakeries in our system.” Unfortunate is an understatement. Don’t tell me you don’t remember what almost happened to Twinkies. They were almost completely out of business, until loyal customers decided to try and purchase as many as they could before the treat became extinct. Well purchase they did, and so much so that they helped Twinkies get back into the game.
Let’s take a moment. Try to think of something that can replace your Entenmann’s addiction. I’ll give you a few more minutes. Nothing? I know. It’s hard. But we’re in this together. According to Newsday, “Workers hugged and looked downcast after the company delivered the bitter news at a hotel in Hauppauge Thursday morning.” Please share your Entenmann’s experience with us below and we can be sad together. If only we had a box of miniature chocolate chip cookies to soften to blow.